If you asked who spoke at my high school graduation, I couldnāt tell you.
I donāt even know if we had a speaker 49 years ago, in 1974.
I have a pretty good memory and Iām thinking if someone did speak, any advice imparted didnāt amount to much.
They say we remember the things that are meaningful to us; we forget those that arenāt.
As a newspaper reporter, Iāve covered many high school and college graduations over 35 years and listened to a lot of speeches; some thoughtful, some mediocre and others downright insipid.
I got to thinking about what I would say if asked to give a high school graduation speech. I could dream up all kinds of highfalutin advice and wax on philosophically about how to live life, pretending Iām wiser than I am. But that would be disingenuous.
When I think about the things I wish I had done over almost 50 years, or those Iām glad I did, the more I conclude it was the simple things that made a difference in my life, not the pursuance of lofty goals or extraordinary wealth. While itās true money can buy you some happiness, it canāt assure eternal life.
The following, then, is my humble, unsolicited advice to graduates:
ā¦Ā Be structured: Rise every morning with purpose, even if itās not a work day. If you are open to adventure, it will come.
ā¦Ā Work: If youāre like me, youāll have some tedious, boring jobs early in life that will ultimately lead to a great one that is so fulfilling you canāt imagine doing anything else. In this case, the oft-cited advice a lot of graduation speakers utter ā ādo what you love and happiness will followā ā is true.
ā¦Ā Save money: No matter how little you earn at early jobs, put some away, every week. And then when you have enough, get a good financial advisor and invest wisely. But donāt put it all in places where you canāt touch it for years. That benefits the advisor, not you.
ā¦Ā Get in the dirt: Grow a vegetable garden. Digging your fingers in the earth and growing your own food, no matter your financial or social status, keeps you humble and thoughtful and gives you satisfaction in knowing you can feed yourself.
ā¦Ā Exercise daily: Get outdoors and walk, swim, ride a bike, ski or whatever it is you enjoy most. Youāll be happier and healthier.
ā¦Ā Sleep a lot: Go to bed when youāre tired and get up when youāre not. Your body knows what you need. I knew a woman in her 70s who slept only four hours a night and was very active, always boasting about how much she got done while the rest of us were all sleeping. She died a couple years later.
ā¦Ā Own a cat (or a dog), or two: Or let them own you. They keep you grounded, generous, calm and entertained. Their upkeep is minimal compared to how bereft you would be without them.
ā¦Ā Splurge sometimes: What is all your hard work for if you donāt treat yourself? What will all of it have been worth if you die tomorrow?
ā¦Ā Spend time with old people: They will teach you everything about everything.
ā¦Ā Address fear: Having a little keeps you vigilant and practical, but too much and it runs your life. Run it, instead. A journalism textbook from my early college years said we must do what we are afraid to do and what we donāt want to do. Just do it.
Lastly, I share a piece of advice my late father passed on from a physician friend: When your finances fail, work. When your marriage fails, work. When youāre depressed and all seems lost, work. But in the process, always take time to be lazy.
Amy Calder has been a Morning Sentinel reporter 35 years. Her columns appear here weekly. She is the author of the book āComfort is an Old Barn,ā a collection of her curated columns, published in 2023 by Islandport Press. She may be reached at acalder@centralmaine.com. For previous Reporting Aside columns, go to centralmaine.com.
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